Last Try

Here's my last try at being coherent on a subject that I've had difficulty writing clearly about. Here goes: I remember giving advice to a soon-to-be married couple at a bridal shower. The guests were asked to write down one piece of advice for the married couple. Me, not even dating at the time, wondered what in the world to write. "Love each other." That seemed a little...basic. I wracked my brain. There had to be some tidbit of advice I had floating around in my brain. Something! At last an old adage I had heard before came back to me. "Never go to bed angry with each other." I glibly wrote it down, satisfied that I had given a good piece of advice. Years later, as I think back to that incident, I have to laugh. Personally, that advice hasn't worked for me. It may work for some people, but not everyone. I've learned that sometimes it's best to let time do it's work. Sure, don't go to bed yelling and screaming at each other("let not the sun go down on your wrath" comes to mind), but on the other hand, does every problem that comes up have to be resolved immediately? Touchy subjects should probably be discussed when touchy people are a little less...touchy. I've been mad at Mike before, brought it up at the wrong time, and been furious about twenty other things as a result of two angry people butting heads. Better to have waited till I had cooled down. What I'm trying to get at, is that everyone is different. If you marry Mr. Calm-and Cool-Headed Who-Never-Blows-His-Top, having discussions at any time probably works for you. But if you are married to Mr. Short-Fuse you might be better off waiting till the morrow. There is no one size fits all solutions out there! Well, hardly any. Look at the Bible. How many verses are there that specifically talk about raising children? I'm talking SPECIFICS. Like, "You must punish all of your children in the same manner when they are disobedient" or "You must not allow...etc." You get the drift. The point being, the Bible isn't nitty-gritty specific when it comes to child-rearing, marriage, and many other aspects of life. So that's my beef (if you will) about marriage books, and child-rearing books, and all the rest out there. Many times, it's the author's experience that he/she is relying on. So going back to my memory at the beginning of this post, how useful one's advice is depends entirely on what you do with it. If a book promotes principles from God's Word, it's worth a read. But if all sorts of expectations and recommendations are promoted without Biblical credence, use caution. You know, maybe I don't have to run to the bathroom, slap on my makeup, and try to look BEAUTIFUL every time the hubby comes home. Maybe it's okay to wear my sweats once in awhile. For that matter, (in my case), maybe he LIKES me in sweatpants. Ever think of that?